


Dick Grayson is a little shit(but I love him anyways)

by Najspinel



Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU, Robin (Comics), Teen Titans (Animated Series), Young Justice (Cartoon)
Genre: Bisexual Dick Grayson, Damian is the oldest, Dick is still the OG robin, Dick is the youngest, LBGTQ+ topics, Mostly about Dick, Multi, Reverse Age, Reverse!Batfam, dick is a little shit, he isn’t as innocent as everyone thinks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:20:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28093794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Najspinel/pseuds/Najspinel
Summary: Just a bunch of Dick’s shenanigans~The batfam will almost always be reverse ageDick is 13 in all of these unless I mention otherwiseThis is going to be shitDONT READ!!
Relationships: Artemis Crock/Zatanna Zatara, Dick Grayson/Red X, Kid Flash/Robin, roy/jason
Comments: 5
Kudos: 36





	1. Chapter 1

Comment ideas on what I should write.  
(I WILL NOT WRITE ANY ADULT X DICK, OR ANY OF HIS BROTHERS X DICK)


	2. Pranks #1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dick is left alone at home and gets revenge......   
> Reverse!batfam

**Ages:**

**Damian-18**

**Tim-16**

**Jason-15**

**Dick(Robin)-13**

**I’m too lazy to do the rest so use your imagination, dick is the youngest and Damian is the oldest.**

  
  


Dick was bored out of his mind, everyone except for him were gone on ‘missions’.

Bruce was on a off planet mission with the league, Damian was training with the league of assassins, Tim was helping debug Red Tornado after Jason tried to download GTA on him, Jason…… was probably sucking face with Roy somewhere, and Alfred was on a (very much needed and well deserved) vacation.

Not to mention Bruce banned Dick from going out on patrol while everyone was gone, and prohibited Dick from using the gym until he got back.

So while everyone was gone Dick was stuck home,alone,with nothing to do…...right?

Dick was laying on the chandelier when he suddenly sat up, if they were going to take away his only form of entertainment and leave him behind…..he was going to get revenge. (Not on Alfred though,the poor man worked too hard)

Lucky for Dick, Bruce made a rule that no one is allowed to bring any personal items when they are out playing superhero….. including phones.

His first victim….. Tim.

Tim always left his door unlocked so this made Dick’s job much easier…… 

*insert devil emoji*

Once Dick got into his older brothers room he immediately saw Tim’s phone next to his laptop *oh god* 

After a few seconds of hacking into Tim’s laptop and phone he set to work.

First he set Tim’s ringtone and Alarms as the song *im a Barbie girl*, and he set the wallpaper as a video of Red Hood.

Then he started on the laptop...

‘Tim is gonna  **HATE** this’ Dick cackled to himself 

Dick changed the settings so one earbud would always be really quiet while the other is blaring, he changed all app icons to pictures of Britney Spears, and he changed the background to a collage of hentai characters…. (mostly of Yuri from Yarichin Bitch club)

And considering Jason watches anime and probably porn he definitely has seen at least one of these hentais.

_ No one will think I did this prank because I’m their “precious, innocent, defenseless, baby-bird” 🙄 - thought Dick  _

Now it was Jason’s turn……. 

  
  


Once he got to Jason’s room the first thing he saw was Jason’s Nintendo switch….

Dick who had his own switch longer than Jason had multiple cases for his switch, many of them he had Customized himself. 

While Dick had many cases for his switch Jason only had one...the original.

So obviously Dick went and got the most  _ embarrassing  _ one.

‘Just for you Jay, it’s  _ so _ manly and badass. Just like you’ Dick said while trying to hold in his giggles.

He gave Jason a bright pink case with stickers of Red Robin (Tim), mlp characters, and Barbie… and on the back it said ‘live, laugh, love’-some random basic white girl

‘Pfft’-Dick burst out laughing picturing Jason as a basic white girl.

He then grabbed Jason’s phone and unlocked it.

‘ _ You would think an apprentice of  _ **_The Batman_ ** _ would have a harder password, not 543210’  _ Dick murmured to himself 

He went into Jason’s contacts and renamed most of them.

Roy - Daddy💞🥵

Baby bird (Dick) - The best brother in the world no take backs 😼

Demon (Damian) - more badass then you ever will be so shut up and cry about it 🌚

Replacement(Tim)- not his fault you died so stop being a little bitch 🙂

Bruce- I aM yOuR fAtHeR🗿

Alfred- GRANDPA PA /THE MOST AMAZING BUTLER👨‍🦲

Cass- 👁👅👁

Stephanie- sir this is a Wendy’s 👱‍♀️

Duke- Cinderella 2.0

Diana- mom

Talia-momma

Selina- mother

The west kid (Wally)- HAS BIGGER DICK ENERGY THEN YOU🕺

Barbra- Leprechaun 🤡👩🏼‍🦰

He also hacked the phone so whenever Jason unlocks it the song 

‘Oops I did it again’ would play.

  
  


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Time for the Demon.

Unlike his other brothers Dick was having a harder time deciding what to do to his oldest sibling. 

Since Damian was actually smart, he had a mechanical door so people would have a hard time pranking him and well…..trying to kidnap him. (I mean they are the kids of the most powerful man in Gotham)

Finally he decided on his prank, it was nothing too extreme considering Dami is by far the scariest sibling when he’s mad.

Since the demon’s door was a fingerprint scanner Dick had to hack into it, making sure Damian didn’t receive an alert telling him his security was breached.

Dick then hacked the door so every time it was opened it would play the song ‘ _ killing me softly with his song’  _

Dick then suddenly ran to his room grabbing his old 3D cardboard cutouts of Sangwoo and Yoonbum and ran back to his older brother's room. 

Since the cardboard pieces were shaped very lifelike, Dick was sure he would get Damian with them.

He put the sangwoo shaped masterpiece in Damian’s closet and Yoonbum under his bed.

The young acrobat was just about to leave Dami’s room when he spotted the elder’s phone….. he was going to rename everyone in his phone then text weird shit to Flash.

As soon as Dick opened his contacts he sighed, the names were so Damian-like.

Mother- bIrTh gIvEr👨‍🦲👀

Bruce- mOtHeR fUcKeR😩🍆💦

Drake(Tim)- little shit💩👶🏻

Todd(Jason)- bigger shit💩

Richard(Dick)- watched his parents get murdered #2

Cassandra- NiNgA pA pA~🥷🏻

Stephanie- Angel 👼👺

Roy- if Peter Pan was red and had anger issues🧍‍♂️🏹

Duke- I name thee as thy rOyal DUKE 🤴🏾

The west kid(Wally)- Dick’s fugly leprechaun 👹💖

Barbra Gordon- part-time furry #3🤡🐈‍⬛

Clark Kent- uncle Clark 🦸🏻‍♂️💃

Barry- GO WHITE BOY,GO🏃‍ 💨 

He then decided to send some very un-Damian-like texts to some people.

  
  


Chat with

GO WHITE BOY,GO 🏃 💨 

Demon: sHaWty had tHeM jEEaNs~

Demon: bOoTs wIth thE fURrr~

Damian?

Are you ok?

Are you in danger?

Do I need to call bats?

But you're with your mom?

Did she attack you?!!

Is a cry for help?!

OH GOD!

ARE YOU SAFE!

DONT DIE!

Demon: had thE whOle clUb lOoKiNg aT hErrrrrr

Demon:I’m fine, Batman is my mentor 😐

WHO ARE YOU! YOU JUST USED AN EMOJI

DAMIAN DOESN'T USE EMOJIS 

Demon:......dumb,

Demon:dumb as hell

Oh….it is you

Demon is offline 

  
  
  
  


Ok now it was Bruce’s turn….

First dick grabbed some light colored clothes and dyed them hot pink.

(his/Wally’s favorite color)

Then he hacked in the Bluetooth speakers so every day at 3:56am it would play ‘freak’ by our queen Doja Cat.

Dick hacked the WiFi so Bruce’s WiFi would shut off every Tuesday at 4:20am and pm.

He then grabbed one of his old robots he built when he was bored and coded it so it would shave off his ‘father’s’ eyebrows at 2:56am on the following day.

  
  


Now to conclude his prank on his adoptive family he was going to consume as much sugar as possible.

The family was coming home soon and Dick already opened the safe-box in the kitchen that was full of candy and treats, he grabbed almost everything…. 

Alfred was the first to come home, Dick had warned him about the pranks and the soon to be ‘sugar disaster #2’

In the meantime Dick decided to binge watch anime and TikTok till everyone got home.

Dick was in the middle of a Haikyuu episode when the front door slammed open and yelling (courtesy of Jason) to make their presence known.

Alfred quickly said hello as he welcomed the family back then announced he needed to go to the store and left as a que for dick to start his final prank.

The small boy then ran to his family said hello and raced to his room, then he started to consume as much candy and sugary snacks.

The rest of the family was currently in the kitchen talking, not having found out about the other planks yet….

  
  
  



	3. Chapter 3

Can you guys please help me with ideas, I have no idea what to write. I also have this book up on Wattpad under ‘ Dick Grayson one shots‘ by naj fresh.  
https://www.wattpad.com/story/249749285-dick-grayson-oneshots   
Again feel free to comment some ideas!


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